Wednesday, 29 January 2014

Obscure terminology

It has happened again.
Another delivery to the inbox.
Another attachment.
Another presentation on a specific area of relevance for a client that has been concocted by one of the myriads of soldier ants that populate the large consultancies over the pond.
A request to 'have a look' at what has been pulled together and feedback views and opinions.

Quite frankly, I am torn between saying it 'as I see it' or reserving judgement.

Why? (you may ask)

Because of the ridiculous terminology this other consulting firm - way larger than my business partners and I will ever be - has resorted to in order to get a very easy and straightforward message across.

What? (I hear you say)

Indeed. A case of 'stating the bleedin' obvious' in a manner so obscure and convoluted, I had to read the presentation three times before getting to grips with what message the authors were trying to convey.

How? (you ask again)

Let me give you an example: opportunity development cadence.

Now, last time I looked, 'cadence' referred to the beat or measure of something rhythmic.
It is also common terminology in cycling and refers to the number of revolutions of the crank per minute, ie. the rate at which the cyclist is pedalling.

So, to put this in perspective, I could tell my client that the presentation they have shared with me is interesting, relevant to the objectives sought, but that I am confused as to why they need to deploy a cyclical revolution calculator to assess business opportunities.

Alternatively I could just be more straightforward and say it was a load of bollocks.

And that my business partners and I can do far better - with no jargon - and get results.

Oh, and charge a lot less too.

(c) David Fletcher

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