Saturday, 14 May 2011

Even more random conversations with my training partner(s)

Collecting the kids from after school club.
LCM (looking very pleased with herself) - "I've just been for a bridges run!"
BB - "How far?"
LCM - "Usual, 5km..."
BB - "I did a training session today with Pro Athlete."
LCM - "Oh? Really? What did you do?"
BB (taking deep breath) - "One lap of Richmond Park_"
LCM - "That's it?"
BB (continuing and rolling eyes) - "_ to warm up, which was equivalent to our 'fast' pace, then 'brick' sessions which consisted of half lap sprints up the hill, back down, with four runs of 2.5km in between each one."
LCM (totally deflated) - "I think I might need to 'up' my training schedule..."

At early morning open water swim venue.
BB (pulling on wetsuit effortlessly) - "I need to buy some socks."
LCM (having another wrestling match with the PVC) - "Socks? To wear with your wetsuit?"
BB (tutting) - "Noooooo. Neoprene socks."
Walks off and returns with purchased socks and puts them on.
LCM - "Hmmm. Yep. Nice. Not quite a fashion statement, but..."
BB - "They will keep my feet warm."
LCM - "Not when they're wet."

By text.
LCM - Just picked up brand spanking new wetsuit plus loads of other goodies thrown in. Am more excited about this than the race on Sunday.
BB - :-) Want to see all!
LCM - Very tempted to put it on in the office and see if anyone notices.
BB - Go for it!
LCM - Missing my vintage swim cap for full effect.
BB - Hee hee, you might not need wetsuit after all...

The next day BB sees this.
With my new best friend - Jim
BB - You did not!
LCM - Oh yes, I did!

Open water swimming with WW, spotting a female in some distress with two others by the first buoy.
WW - "Do you think she is okay?"
LCM - "No idea. Maybe they are practising a rescue routine?"
WW - "Maybe she is in trouble?"
LCM (contemplating the 800m course ahead) - "Should we help?"
WW - "I'd be no use. I'd probably end up being rescued as well."
LCM - "Good point. Shall we swim?"
WW - "I still might need rescuing..."

On the phone.
BB - "Where are you on July 30th?"
LCM - "On a plane returning to the UK."
BB (sounding disappointed) - "Oh."
LCM - "Okay, okay. What triathlon are you looking at now?"
BB - "London triathlon?"
LCM (groans) - "No, definitely not here."
BB (all perky) - "How about the Hyde Park triathlon on August 6th? I have put my name on the waiting list!"
LCM - "Isn't that where you have to swim in the Serpentine?"
BB - "Yep."
LCM - "Absolutely no bloody way! I am not swimming through goose shit."
BB - "Oh, com'on! Your neighbour did it last year, he enjoyed it!"
LCM - "He also said a snorkel would have been a good idea."
BB (sound of sulking down the phone line)
LCM (sighing) - "I'll ask WW when I see her. She might be game to join you."

Later that week.
LCM - "BB wants to know if you will do the Hyde Park triathlon with her?"
WW - "Isn't that the one where you swim in the Serpentine?"
LCM - "Yup. What I said too."
WW (glares at LCM)
LCM - "Okay, I'll tell her that's a 'no' then."

p.s. And just in case you think I am making these up, I have offered BB a 'right of reply', but she is too busy training to take up this challenge. So far. When she has whipped my arse (again) at the next race, I am sure she will find the time.


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